Sunday, June 2, 2019

What a Day for a Daydream...

This blog is going to be about how FTD robs us of the ability to daydream and remember some of our past.  But first, I've got to write about a couple other things. If you don't care about my personal life, just skip ahead two paragraphs.

First of all... Rushing around is apparently a bad idea for those with FTD, at least for this person with FTD.  I received a call from dispatch for the senior van that my van was going to be 10 minutes early. So, I ran around like an idiot. Made sure my husband was in place with his caregiver. I hustled across the garage floor, leading to my flying across the garage floor. I have many bumps and bruises. The only thing that has caused an issue is my knee which remains swollen.  Two lessons learned:  1. This FTD'er should not try to hurry. 2. Using a cane does not keep you from falling when you are doing things you know you shouldn't. What I haven't figured out yet is how does one manage to land on both knees, hit the front of your head on the concrete floor, then land hard on your back and shoulder? I didn't drop my cane though! 

The next thing is actually a blessing. My husband's caregiver, also our friend, had to have shoulder replacement surgery. I was feeling guilty that I could not go to her house and help her out. Her son only stayed until the day after surgery. This wonder of a woman never asks for help, so I was thrilled when she called and took me up on my offer for her to stay with us until she was mobile and comfortable enough to stay by herself. So, here we are, one with FTD, one with Alzheimer's and one who can't do much of anything, all taking care of each other. Believe it or not this is working really well. Who would have guessed it? Just three peas in a pod.

Thank you for bearing through my personal tales. 

Last week, during a support group meeting, another FTD'er mentioned that it is impossible for us to daydream as well as not easily remembering the past. This was an eye-opening bit of information to me.  Of course, I had to research the subject, and she was definitely correct.

Daydreaming, it turns out, is an important part of life. It is during daydreaming that we often have that "why didn't I think of that before" moment leading to solving a problem we had been struggling with. What happens is that our mind is wandering, opening it to envision answers to problems that we were previously unable to do.  Daydreaming also provides part of our individual identity.

Yes, researchers have found that this ability to daydream, as well as to remember past events, can reduce our sense of identity. When the ability of the brain to remember the past or predict what might be in our future is stolen, it seems to make us question just who we are, figuratively, not literally.

Think about what you do when you are bored. Most likely, your mind wanders and your imagination kicks in and you find yourself daydreaming.  What would happen if you could not sit and daydream?  You would be stuck in that moment. You can't remember many things from your past and can not imagine what you might do in the future. If this is true. and according to three resources I found, it is, then hink about it. If you are limited in what you can do due to your FTD and you cannot even let your mind wander into a daydream to ease your boredom, or imagine how to do something, how would you occupy your mind?

Those of us with FTD tend to be, dare I say, stubborn?  If you cannot visualize an alternative, you would want things to be the way they have always been or done. That could also be why we tend to need routines in our life, because we cannot imagine doing it any other way. 

Does this affect everyone with dementia? This problem is most prevalent among those with FTD. It does not seem to affect those with Alzheimer's Disease, certainly not to the extent it does with FTD.

I wish I had suggestions on how to "fix" this problem but I could not find anything except that over-used suggestion "Try to keep the mind busy." Wait, what you just told me is that I cannot think about new ideas. How am I supposed to learn how to do something new? Next, are they going to suggest we eat more green vegetables? Or to keep busy by doing crossword puzzles? I apologize for being cynical here, but I am tired of hearing the same generalized advice that is given to everyone. 

My bottom line here:  

Caregivers, if you know these facts, hopefully, you will be able to understand your FTD'er a bit better.

To those of us with FTD, my advice is to stop beating yourself up because you cannot figure out how to do new things, cannot remember how to do the things you used to do, need a list or post-it note to remind yourself to do things or to not do things, do not realize when you see something that needs done but don't realize you should do something about it or get agitated because there is something new in the room. It's not your fault that your brain can't do it! 

I am guessing this is why I won't let anyone move anything in my house. I want things where they have always been and can not imagine why anyone would want to move them since they are fine where they are. I realized, as soon as my friend on the support group said we cannot daydream, that I don't. If I am sitting around with nothing to do, I do what I call "zoning out". Not exactly keeping my mind busy...

1 comment:

kate said...

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